I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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