he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
