nut hugger
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
