so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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