it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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