i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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