I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
So squirting runs in the family.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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