You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
