You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
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