Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Two words: nipple clamps
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