Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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