Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
