We need to rekindle our bromance
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
