I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
