real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Dignity is for republicans.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
