when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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