i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
