I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
