my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
