so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
