Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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