I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
