Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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