OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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