at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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