so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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