I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
