u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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