Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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