who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize