that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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