Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
