The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
