yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
