best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
