I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
do herpes really smell.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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