it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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