His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
