Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
