if you like me you must not know who I am
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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