Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I'm both gender and math confused
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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