wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
its not stalking. its research.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
