I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I will be naked everywhere
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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