I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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