She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
