I CAN MOONWALK!
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
