"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
