Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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