We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
