What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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