Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
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